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BROKEN LINES is an independently produced & distributed series of comics, which will theoretically make one big ol' graphic novel when completed. In its brief existence, Broken Lines has garnered some fine and positive reviews, which guarantees certain commercial failure. So with any luck, continued critical praise will doom the entire venture. So buy 'em while you can! Ha-ha!
Issue #2 has been released! Issue #3 is finished, and I just need to get off my ass and proofread it for the billionth time, then prep it for the printer. Keep your breath appropriately bated. - June 23, 2008
Click for a 10 pg. PDF preview of Issue #1
"Quite simply a masterpiece... intelligent, entertaining, and in a word, freaking awesome."
"The sense of humor is truly absurd... the reader is still left wanting more."
"...(its) gonzo mix of story and art, both confusing and oddly effective."
"The characters are simply brilliant and the dialog is smart and entertaining."
"Swerving between quirky and flat-out strange... a solidly creative effort."
"You will not be disappointed."
Read the full reviews & more here.
CONTACT
refer to the Standard Design website
or join the FaceBook Group
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BROKEN LINES - ISSUE ONE
44 pp | $4.95 | released March 2008
Click here for 10 pg PDF preview
"The squat spaceman in booth four sits absolutely still; the visor glass of his helmet is heavily tinted and it is indeterminable to the casual observer as to whether he is enjoying the orchestral version of “Sweet Caroline” or not."
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CHAPTER ONE: BIG SNOW
An Introduction of Major Characters and a Semi-Adventure Devised to Thrill Our Simpler Readers: A lonely waitress joins in the battle against Evil when she teams up with a cowboy and a spaceman in a stolen rental van for a cross-country mission to deliver some very special cargo! In this first chapter the reader is introduced to a group of wanton Bad Guys, as well as the non-standard format of the book, possibly causing said reader to decline the purchase of subsequent issues. Lotsa laffs. Tales of redemption, rebirth, etc. Not too much in the action department. Conspicuous use of big words; run-on sentences; semicolons. Overt use of cusswords. Fuck dang bum poop!
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BROKEN LINES - ISSUE TWO
40 pp | $4.95 | released June 2008
"She wants to punch something because she’s angry, but she’s not angry enough to purposely hurt her hand. And that just makes her angrier. But still not angry enough to punch anything. Which makes her furious."
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CHAPTER TWO: INVENTORY
In Which Several Possibly Important Things Are Revealed, Though They Are Pretty Meaningless, Generally Speaking: After experiencing a mechanical setback while en route to Our Heroes' as-yet unrevealed destination, the decision is made to take temporary employment in order to earn some fast'n'crazy dollars. Absolutely nothing of consequence takes place in this chapter, I swear. But it is rich in character development. Oh, wait, I guess there's like, one important thing.
CHAPTER THREE: THE VAMPIRE HUNTERS: PART II
As Our Heroes Continue on Their As-Yet Unexplained Quest, The Plot Fails to Thicken: While pausing at a highway convenience store to purchase delicious snacks, Our Heroes come face-to-face with a new group of possibly evil Bad Guys. The situation gets tense, tempers flare, and windshield wiper fluid goes on sale for only $3.99, which is an absolute ripoff because it's mostly water, but if you're buying windshield wiper fluid at a convenience store on the side of the highway, you probably have no choice. Smooth move. Next time, be a little more prepared.
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BROKEN LINES - ISSUE ONE & TWO COMBO PROMO BOOK
84 pp | $7.99 | released March 2007
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This promotional book includes all of Issue One and Issue Two (described above) presented in a slightly different format, and including guest artwork from Jason Goad, Mister Reusch and a cover by Jared Connor (The guest artwork is not available in the regular issues). Basically, I laid it out last year and then changed my mind about the presentation. It's 84 pages, with a perfect-bound spine. These were made to send out to reviewers and I sold a couple (in a futile attempt) to recoup my printing costs. I only have a handful of these books remaining. Ooohhh, collectible!
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BROKEN LINES - ISSUE THREE
40pp | available late summer 2008 | STATUS: prepress & proofreadin'
“You guys have a real hang-up about costumes, you know that?” she scolds. “Oh, I’m a cowboy! Oh, I’m a spaceman! Oh, I’m a vampire!” she mimics with a shrill. “Look at my cute little outfit!”
CHAPTER FOUR: CHAINS BETWEEN ANCHORS
In Which Select Items are 30-50% Off Lowest Marked Price Now Through Sunday: Following a wardrobe malfunction (hip cultural reference circa 2004), Our Heroes find themselves in Hell, where they are soon separated from each other. One escapes, one finds himself in the hands of his mysterious pursuers, and the third fella finds himself in some converted office space a few floors above Hell.
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BROKEN LINES - ISSUE FOUR
52pp | available early 2009 | STATUS: Half written and a few drawings done
"You are in a room. It is a square room with no windows and no furniture. There is a door. The door is locked. There is a hamburger stuck in the keyhole."
CHAPTER FIVE: THE MALEFICENTS
In Which All Sorts of Exciting Shit Occurs: Each Hero has a very thrilling adventure off on their own: One involves walking the dog, one is a humourous parody of a scene from a famous movie, like "Family Guy" always does, except it is even less entertaining, if that's even possible, and one adventure is just a lot of boring talking that is bound to put you to sleep or make you very angry. Our Brave Heroes are then reunited in a completely fantastical unrealistic manner that will make you wonder if perhaps "Deus ex machin-i-est" is really a phrase, and if so, is there an award for it, and if so, is it possible for you to nominate me for said award. But it's all in good fun, isn't it!
CHAPTER SIX: EMPTY
In Which a Fantastic Tale Explains an Amazing Resurrection: A cowboy tells a kooky story around the ol' campfire.
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BROKEN LINES - ISSUE FIVE
??pp | available 2010, I bet | STATUS: Outline written, no artwork. Available for sale in 2010, which is totally fucking forever from now
“They got ISBNs?” the cowboy asks. See? I told you he knows modern shit.
CHAPTER SEVEN: THE AWESOMEST DUDE IN THE WORLD
In Which The Author Loses What Little Credibility He Had Left Amongst His Peers: A cup of coffee turns into a deadly game of philosophical cat-and-mouse! Except the situation is not really all that deadly, it's simply the adjective of choice to precede phrases like "game of cat-and-mouse". And I guess the cat-and-mouse part doesn't really apply, either.
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